Why did this happen to me?

I recently responded to a post wherein the question was asked, “Why did this happen to me?”

While I agree with the author that at some point you must stop asking that question and move on;
however, if you do that without finding an answer, you risk leaving unfinished business behind.
And it is likely unfinished business of life that cannot be ignored.

Perhaps the better question to ask is, “What is my lesson here?”

Whatever happened to you happened for a reason.
It happened to you to teach you a lesson — or should I say, give you an opportunity to learn something new.
Or change your ways…
Perhaps it’s something that you’ve needed to learn for a long time and now is the time for you to get it.

As I see it (experience life), the messages start softly like a whisper…
an overheard conversation, a song on the radio, someone making a suggestion…
No big deal, so you ignore it.

But God, the Universe, Allah, et al is persistent.

The message gets louder…

more requests, warnings, someone else has the problem, something gets your attention a bit more.
Still, not your problem, too much already to do, so you ignore it.
Again God, the Universe, Allah, et al is persistent.

Wham! You get hit by a bus!
“Why did this happen to me?”
Because you were not paying attention to the previous messages that were there all along.
And not taking action.
Not learning and changing.

Evolving as is demanded by life.

Now the message is loud enough, front & center, and demands immediate attention.
Continue to ignore it at your peril.
I recommend that you keep asking, “What is my lesson here?” until you come up with an answer.
Hint: The answer is about you (no others to blame), and how must you be / behave differently?

Like how?

Perhaps you just need to start looking at something or someone differently.
Allow your perception of them to change along with their own evolution.

For example, your kids are adults and not your babies anymore.
Always pushing for the sale before you have a sufficient business relationship established, and losing deals.
Getting fired over and over again because you won’t give your employer what they really want.
Your spouse files for divorce — (out of the blue!) => Because you aren’t [and haven’t been] paying attention to him/her!

Think about it, none of it happens to you.
It happens because of you!

Every time something happens to you…
Spirit is trying to get your attention to get you to better align yourself with the Universe.
When you don’t hear the message, S/He turns up the volume.
Better to sooner ask, “What is my lesson here?”
And look for the answer within.

About the author

Burke Franklin

I‘ve been helping entrepreneurs and business owners for more than 40 years — mostly from within our Business Power Tools software apps and templates, and thru my blogs and book Business Black Belt. In the early ’80s, I was the electronics buyer and copywriter for the Sharper Image catalog. Later, I also sold some really cool word-processors in Silicon Valley. After Macs and PCs became popular, I started my own business creating sales literature for tech companies. A friend had a deal going to sell his engineering software to Apple. They wanted to see his business plan to be sure his company would stay in business to upgrade and support the system. At the time, I viewed a business plan as an elaborate brochure that sold his concept to people at all levels, and responsibilities with various perceptions, biases, and interests. (I learned that from selling word-processors.) We got the deal. Over the next year, people came to me with some brilliant ideas, but their plans weren’t getting funded. I helped them fill-in the missing parts to succeed. Along the way, I saw that business plans have a fundamentally universal structure. Hmmm… I took all the content I’d developed, redacted everything proprietary, but filled in the blanks with a variety of customizable multiple-choice options, and offered it as a software template that many people could use… This became BizPlanBuilder. And my new company took off! We followed-up with MarketingBuilder, which picked-up where BizPlanBuilder left off, then we went even further with PRBuilder which included sample press release templates… In another direction, we added EmployeeManualBuilder and SafetyPlanBuilder full of actual policies and procedures. Altogether, we had 10 products in about 3,500 retail stores and built a $12 million company with 30 employees… Today, all of our products have been integrated into a streamlined online dashboard. And we’re the leader in business development software templates.